You Know You've Been Living in Uganda for a Long Time When...

- You don’t say goodbye when you are done on the phone.
- You drive over curbs and sidewalks to avoid the jam.
- You raise your eyebrows instead of nodding your head or responding verbally.
- You consider how many cows or bunches of banana you’d be worth should you get married.
- You eat at really nice restaurants and wonder why beans aren’t on the menu.
- You laugh when a mini bus crashes into the side of your car… or when you crash into your friend’s car… or when you are rear ended by a tractor trailer… or when…
- You are no longer afraid of diseases like schistosomiasis, sleeping sickness, malaria, etc.
- You use grammar like: “you take,” “we go,” or “I fear.”
- You have to go on safari… again.
- You yell "muzungu" at other westerners, especially the really pale ones.
- You are writing about living in Uganda for a long time and a friend suggests, “when anything fried tastes good” and you respond, “oh, definitely” … you know you’ve been in Uganda for a long time.